Friday, January 6, 2012

~JOY~

JOY~ Its my word for the year. My online friend Amy suggested that we choose a word for the year and so after I prayed about it, It came to me this morning and it inspired me to pick up my laptop and actually get back on the old blogger <3 !
JOY is something that in real life I lack. I am struggling with having JOY at all. I get up every morning and hope that the day will be better, but usually its not. No this is not one of those sugar coated blog post, that make my life sound dreamy and wonderful, because truth is, right now, its not. My oldest daughter is struggling with some things and I am praying for her so much. My mother, who will be 77 in a few days, is also not that well mentally and physically, she is going down hill too. Its a real struggle to handle all the demands of raising my family, homeschooling, and elder care, all at once. Am I thankful I have all this on my plate? Yes! Because without it, I wouldn't have the people in my life I do. We are struggling with homeschooling I just haven't been able to pull it together since I had Jack. He is a great baby, but was a constant cryer for atleast 6 months, unless I was nursing him or holding him. Now he is a cheerful baby, but is still a hearty, every 2 hour, nurser. But I love him so. Emily is quite the little lady, with quite an attitude to boot. She is still not walking but is starting to stand up in the middle of the floor all alone, so I know its coming soon. She is frustrated alot now, and teething, so that makes her quite testy. I wonder alot if I am doing what the Lord wants me to? I know that deep down, I am. Its just difficult to see the bigger picture at times. I am struggling spiritually because of my physical struggles here and now. So with all this said, I am purposing to FIND and KEEP JOY this year. I am , not question about it. It is my mission. I can NOT go on any longer and try to do it all myself. I have to choose JOY and let GOD handle the rest. He knows my struggles. He knows my needs and He is faithful to fufill HIS promises. So off to start my day.... God bless~

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